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Written by Catherine VanWetter
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Monday, 28 September 2009 01:00 |
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What would your life look like if you took full responsibility for it and stopped blaming others? This at first glance can seem like a daunting endeavor, yet when broken down into small steps, can be very liberating, and it also takes courage. It takes courage to become accountable. When we become accountable for where we are in our life and all that it has taken to get us there, we can begin to show up in ways that empower us rather than disempower us.
Every time we blame someone or something for what is happening in our life, we lose a little part of ourselves because we give our power away. It’s as if those outside of us control our reactions and thus our sense of happiness. Rather than doing this, I invite you to listen to your words as you describe situations that are not to your liking. Do you place the responsibility of how you are feeling on the shoulders of someone else or do you look at how your responses to the situation activated the results? In other words, are you a victim to your circumstances or are you the victor?
While there are times that we are victims to our circumstances, that is, not having control over things outside of us, as we become more aware, part of our responsibility is to honor that and move forward in a way that gives us the opportunity to move beyond the point of collapsing.
So how does one get started? It begins with becoming aware of how you feel when a situation happens. This requires being honest with one’s self. That is, what was your part in the situation and how did you respond it? If you responded in a way that was proactive, taking full responsibility for your response, then you are being accountable. If you responded reactively, and blamed the other person for the outcome, feeling the victim, how much responsibility are you taking? With that in mind how could you turn that around and take responsibility? To do this means practicing self-honesty and awareness to what your response was. With practice and small steps, it becomes easier to notice what your part was. Remember to practice compassion, patience and gentleness with yourself as you begin this wonderfully liberating action towards self-responsibility.
 FREE teleclass: "Honoring Your Past So that you may Embrace This Moment and Step Confidently into Your Future" http://totheheartofthematter.com/teleclass/
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Written by Catherine VanWetter
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Friday, 25 September 2009 01:00 |
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What if you could fully embrace your family, receiving the greatest gift you could ever receive which is the gift of life? What if you could hand back the burdens or issues that you have been carrying that were passed down through the generations, would your life look any different?
Part of the work that I do is based on what I will refer to as the Orders of Love. These orders are part of a natural phenomenon that occurs within a family system.
The first order is that everyone has the right to belong in the family. Anyone who has been excluded from the family needs to be re-included in order for the health and well being of the individual and their family.
The second order is that of equal give and take. This means that the responsibility of the parent is to give love to their children and the responsibility of the child is to take that love.
The third order of love is that everyone has his or her place. Having a place has nothing to do with dominance rather this is how this particular approach to family systems work. When everyone is in their place, everyone knows their role. The “proper” placement is that the father is to the right, the mother to the left of him and the oldest child to the left of his/her mother. When people are out of their place within the family it creates chaos and disorder.
I invite you to imagine in your mind’s eye those within your family that have been excluded, whether there is the equal give and take and if everyone is in their place. By simply becoming aware of this, one can begin to bring balance back into their system.
 FREE teleclass: "Honoring Your Past So that you may Embrace This Moment and Step Confidently into Your Future" http://totheheartofthematter.com/teleclass/
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Written by Catherine VanWetter
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Thursday, 24 September 2009 01:00 |
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What if everything in your life that has happened to you was perfect, and that all of those past events created the wonderful person you are today? What would your life look like if you could look at your past with kind eyes? Would that make a difference in the way that you live your life?
I work with many folks who have so much shame and guilt about their past. Some are unable to look at their past with compassionate eyes while others blame those around them for how things turned out. When we have unresolved issues of our past it can limit our life today. It’s as if we have tunnel vision and are unable to notice opportunities that are right in front of us. When this happens, we can keep creating the same results and lose confidence in our ability to make changes.
Bringing resolution to unresolved issues creates inner healing and peace. When we can be compassionate towards ourselves and others who may have caused us harm only then, can we release the emotional charge that a particular issue has on us. It’s as if we hold ourselves hostage to the past unless we release it.
When we can bring the unconscious part of our issue forward and have it in our conscious awareness, then we can see the truth in front of us. Bringing it to our awareness like this allows us to see what we are dealing with. The issues that we bury from the past can grow in intensity unless we bring them to the surface. It’s best if you can work with a professional you trust to be witness to your process. Sometimes these buried issues can bring up a lot of emotion so it is best to work with a qualified practitioner who can guide and support you. When doing this deep work, it is amazing how free you will be once you acknowledge and release the trapped emotions. Over time, you will be able to step fully into your present self with compassion and grace.
Inner Resolution Facilitation creates sacred space and safety through ceremony, ritual, community and connection. It offers witness to individuals who are ready to embrace their "story" of whom they think they are; fully honoring all of their parts, all of their wounds and all of the dark memories that they push away. This process allows for an individual to consent to the fate or circumstance that they were born into, to love all of themselves and to take the greatest gift they were given from their parents, which is the gift of life. Through this deep honoring, an individual has the choice to move beyond their wounds of the past, facilitating deep healing leading to inner peace.
 Free teleclass "Honoring Your Past So that you may Embrace This Moment and Step Confidently into Your Future" http://totheheartofthematter.com/teleclass/
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Written by Catherine VanWetter
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Wednesday, 23 September 2009 01:00 |
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Written by Catherine VanWetter
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Wednesday, 16 September 2009 01:00 |
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